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Hollywood's Hot and Heavy Love Affair With the Penis (Fake or Otherwise)

The recent release of The Overnight, in which a large (and prosthetic) penis plays a large but unbilled role, has once again raised the issue of male genitalia in mainstream movies. Specifically, the full-frontal assault of full-frontal. When discussing the pioneers in this genre, the touchstone film is The Full Monty, which didn't fully deliver on that promise. These films do, however, which is why they are deemed seminal. Whether it's a moody portrayal of a really screwed up addict or an over-the-top comedy like The Hangover, you're sure to find yourself staring at what you oughtn't in these films.

American Pie: The Citizen Kane of teen-sex gross-out films features a fresh-faced Jason Biggs putting that most private part of himself in our faces, and in an apple pie. The producers reportedly had to do a lot of finagling (and editing) to get the film's original rating of NC-17 knocked down to an R.

Boogie Nights: Mark Wahlberg made a huge impression in this breakout role as porn star Dirk Diggler, who rides his astoundingly large appendage to fame, fortune and then a squalid end in Swingin' Seventies L.A. And yes, that was a prosthesis. Something did come between Markie Mark and his Calvin Kleins.

Trainspotting: This film is just one of the many times Ewan McGregor has proudly displayed his number one asset (and he does so many times here). He also gave it (and us) his all in The Pillow Book, Young Adam and The Velvet Goldmine, which is probably why Cinema Blend refers to him as "our nakedest actor."

The Life of Brian: And now for something completely different: a phallus gag set in biblical Jerusalem. A groggy and unsuspecting Brian wakes up, throws open his shutters and exposes himself to a large crowd of adoring followers who think he's the Messiah. Nothing improves a dick joke like a little heresy.

Gone Girl: This moody mystery got an extra bounce from Ben Affleck flashing "side peen" (think "side boob," then go wash your hands) while getting out of the shower. The GIF went viral despite cease and desist orders, and Big Ben was happy to swing with it, joking about the scene: "It's better in 3-D."

Shame: This similarly moody film follows a strapping and emotionally distant Steve McQueen, played by the multi-talented Michael Fassbender. Nudity abounds in this artfully shot, yet painful portrayal of a sex addict who barely has one hand on the wheel. Unfortunately, that depressingly accurate depiction of a debilitating addiction takes all the fun out of the many shots of Fassbender in very compromising positions.

American Gigolo: This is basically Pretty Woman, if Gere were the pretty woman…and if Pretty Woman were a chick-flick with a murder tacked on. Gere, who is 10 years younger and 10 years prettier here than he was in PW, is decked out in designer clothing, except when he's not.

Bad Lieutenant: No, not the one with Nicolas Cage and Eva Mendes; their Bad Lieutenant isn't nearly as fun as the original, and has no penis tomfoolery. Harvey Kietel's very bad lieutenant is much different and much more naked than Cage's. The Los Angeles Times joked that Kietel gave "one of the rawest and (in more ways than one) most naked screen portraits ever of existential anguish." Proving that no matter how much of a bad-ass you may be, you're always a bit less imposing with your pants around your ankles.

The Hangover: On a lighter note, this dive into the misadventures of a group of allegedly-normal-guys-turned-degenerates-while-on-a-bachelor-party-bender contains some ridiculous nudity on the part of a very brave Ken Jeong. For his not-so-big scene, he emerges from the trunk of a car, naked and swinging around a tire iron. At one point, he briefly wraps his legs around Bradley Cooper's head. Does "ewww" have two w's or three?

Borat: This film contains a full-on, full-frontal cock-fight between Borat and his producer, played respectively by Sacha Baron Cohen and Ken Davitian. This famous scene is not, shockingly, truly a full-frontal nude scene because the offending genitalia are obscured. There is however a scene in which Borat reveals nude pictures of his teenage son to an unsuspecting etiquette coach. Not to worry, the actor pictured is a porn star who is definitely legal.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall: In this break-up rom-com set in stunning Hawaii and star-studded Los Angeles, Jason Segel gets very, very naked. In the opening scene, after he has a happy moment with some sugary cereal and a comically large mixing bowl, enter Sarah Marshall (Kristen Bell), who tells Peter she's in love with someone else and she's dumping him. Peter drops his towel as he throws his hands to his face in girlish shock and dismay. This is no Gone Girl side-shot—this is fully committed, full-frontal for the next few minutes. Peter is so distraught that he plops himself down on a leather couch. Steer clear of that piece of furniture on Craigslist.

Uncommon Knowledge

Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.

Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.

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Reinaldo Massengill

Update: 2024-08-15